Will I ever find a Christian man to marry?

Q: Marriage - I have been asking for a Christian guy to be my husband, then we can serve God together. Time flies and I am still single. Most of my bros and sis at church are married, even with kids. I spoke with a pastor and he told me to keep praying as God knows my heart. But what if God's plan is to have me stay single? Some non-christian guy approached me but how can I love someone that would not love my FATHER? Do you think if I will ever get to meet the right guy? I had a boyfriend (Christian also), I thought he was the one but he broke up with me. I now spend my days crying, what should I do? I have a feeling that God is hiding...

A: Your questions show a very real concern and express your desires and heart needs. Please understand that your desire to be married is a natural God-given heart-need and it is not wrong to long for marriage. I commend you for knowing and deciding that you should not/can not marry a non-believer. That decision would cause much heartache in the long run. I encourage you to be strong and courageous (Joshua 1:9) and keep your priorities clear. Wait for the Christian man God will bring to you.

You asked..."What if God’s plan is to have me stay single?” The Lord is always faithful. If for some specific reason God intends for you to be single...He won’t break your heart. You can trust Him because He loves you more that any one or any man ever can. (John 3:16) God will certainly show you His magnificent plan, purpose and desires for your life it you will seek Him with all of your heart. Your pastor at home gave you great advice when he said “keep praying as God knows your heart.” That is my advice also. Keep praying with a sincere heart and faith. Believe that God is faithful...because He is. Many times God is not saying “No” to us when we are waiting for something that our heart’s long for...but He is saying...”Be still and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10) The word for “still” means...Let go; cease striving; relax. God may be saying to you...cease striving to make this happen and trust the timing to Me!

You asked...”what should I do?” My suggestion to you is...Do not be afraid or discouraged (Joshua 1:9b) I repeat, The Lord is always faithful. He will not disappoint you. He will work in your life and He will do marvelous things. Your job is to “trust in Him with all your heart and not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

What that means is this: Trusting Him with all your heart means...don’t try to make things happen. Don’t go out looking for a husband. It is God’s job to bring the husband to you that He has set apart for you.

• “Do not lean on your own understanding” means... You can’t figure this out on your own. When it seems so sad and hopeless to you; God is at work.
• “In all your ways acknowledge Him" means... declare that He is God and He is good. Give Him full & complete access to your heart and future. Trust in Him and not in what it “seems” to you. Give Him your sorrow, your disappointment, and your longing for a husband and tell Him that you will certainly trust Him and wait.
• “Let Him direct your path” means... Worship God fully and release your future in to His hands. If you let Him decide your path and future you will not miss out on anything. Be still before Him and know that He is God.

Lastly, I would encourage you to begin to pray the prayer from Colossians 1:9&10... "Fill me with the knowledge of Your will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. Help me live a life worthy of You, Oh Lord, to please You in every way; bearing fruit in good works and growing In You.”

If we pray to please the Lord with our lives and to be fruitful we will grow more like Jesus daily. That will prepare you to be a “good wife who will be prepared to bless and please her husband”. I encourage you to use these days to prepare your heart and life to become a gracious, godly, loving woman that honors and obeys the Lord and prepares her heart for all that God has planned for your future. And don't wait for a husband before you start serving the Lord!

May the Lord bless you and keep you constantly in His care,

Pastor Debi
Women's Ministry Pastor